Thursday, August 30, 2012

catch up

i can't believe i let the entire month of august go without any communication.  well, actually - no, i can.  who am i trying to kid?  i have been laid up in bed, sleeping, snoring, drooling on my pillow in the middle of the day, all day, because of this new being growing deep down inside me.  this baby has taken its toll on his mama.

{and yep, i'm gonna put it right out there that i'm brewing another miebs boy.}

i feel similar to how did i with jb; tired, nauseated all day and through the wee hours, eating the strangest of junk food thingies, and oh yeah, sleeping.  a lot.  my husband, bless him, but man, he doesn't always have the words well, you wanted to be pregnant again! oh, he means well...  we are, of course, waiting to find out this baby's sex until he (or she) is caught in benji's hands.  it's quite thrilling, really.  i can't stop daydreaming about what another boy or girl will look like!  fun!  but, i did have that intuition with the first two.  we'll see!

my first prenatal appointment confirmed my thought, that conception date not lmp, would be more in line with our baby's arrival day or week month.  march.  we'll just go with the month of march.  or rather, if this baby has a sense of humor like dylan, they will share an april birthday...

so, here is the first photo op of our teeniest of tiny new baby miebs.  a real cutie, huh?  he looks so much like his brother.  (i'd insert an emoticon if i did that sort of thing.)

at this appointment, i also saw that there was not only this sac, but another sac - only empty.  of course, i thought back to when i was pregnant with dylan.  i had some spotting, so i went in to see what was happening.  "you are pregnant but there is no baby" is what they told me.  i went back a week later and voila!  baby!

as it goes, i am waiting this one out, not able to have another ultrasound until the 18-20 week appointment.  so who knows - maybe that other sac will be filled?  it didn't totally surprise me to see two sacs considering i've been showing for a month, look like i'm 5 months pregnant, and without prompting, jack smooched my belly and announced  THERE'S TWO BOYS IN DERE!  but, i also have to remind myself that this is baby number three for me.  apparently that whole-muscle-memory-hoopla really slaps you in the face the third time around, eh?

on the other hand, i feel this sense to mourn a baby that just wasn't strong enough to form.  vanishing twin, blighted ovum, chromosomal deformities, whatev.  i can't stop reading crap online.  some of it giving me hope, and others just a sense to move on.

but here's to baby number 3!  we love you so much already!  (even if you are only allowing me to eat carbs.)