i'm being bullied by a toddler

there are going to be good days, and there are going to be bad days. i'm aware of this. the hope is that the good times will get you through the not so good ones, but as of late, i can't remember jack being any different than flat-out naughty. a holy terror. a menace to society. and sometimes, a little a-hole. yep, i said it. and do i think i'm out of line? hmm, not really. i've been telling myself things will get better once we get back to normal. once the visitors have said their goodbyes, once grandma d heads south, once it's just me and bubba, back to our routine. but, nothing has changed. he's still his screaming, wild, toy-throwing maniac.

we've had to instill some new rules in our household. we no longer use the N word (no) ... it usually causes him to go on strictly no dialogue for the next 5 minutes. so ben and i are getting really creative with our choice of words. also, if toys are thrown, they go bye-bye. if he screams, he gets a spray in the face from the squirt bottle (yes, just like you do to cats to keep them off furniture) and surprisingly, it works... for the moment. time outs are done for a minute at a time, sitting on our bench in the entry way. if he gets up, the time starts over. and yes, he can cry through the whole time out, if necessary. and lastly, threatening does work. ha. it's amazing that he does respond to these things, but the problem is that he forgets so fast. i remember my parents saying something like sounding like a broken record referring to my brother and i - ah ha! now i get it! i feel like that is my life now. i'm constantly saying the same thing to him, a thousand times a day.

jack is now into climbing in a big way. he's forever barefoot, so his feeties work as great suctions to the cabinets, and he can practically scale up them in one long stride. he's also discovered that the handles work as nice assistants to the top. i was sitting on the sofa, facing the island when i heard him sliding a knife out of the block - he had gotten up on the counter via the cabinet handles! what the heck?! he's also started climbing dylan's changing table to get a better view. nothing is safe, not even his sister!

i guess they are called the terrible twos for a reason. i used to see kids out in store, on airplanes, in restaurants and think, "my kid's not gonna do that." oh, how quick we are to judge! my kid has been the one screaming for no reason in the middle of the grocery store. my kid has thrown a piece of salami on the guy's head in front of us on an airplane. my kid has slapped my face while sitting in a booth with me at a restaurant. all these things that if i would have seen, as an outsider, would have laughed at and said to myself those 6 little words.

along with the good days and bad days thought, i also try to keep in mind that it's not always going to be this hard. jack isn't always going to be this little. the more time that passes, the more he'll understand. and i've never wanted to fast forward any of his life (or now dylan's for the matter), but i really would love to say good bye to the terribles.